by Caroline | Feb 10, 2017 | Self Care
Solstice Slow Down
Raise your hand if you love winter. …(Bueller?) Thought so. It most people’s least favorite time of year. But after you read this, my hope is that you feel a little differently. Winter self-care routines are uniquely essential during this season because we have unique needs.
In this season we take a cue from nature. The life force around us retreats inward and is in rest and reflect mode. Though our modern lives dictate otherwise, if we listen to our innermost wisdom, it’s telling us to do the same. Have you ever gotten home from work and it’s only 5:30 but since it’s dark you find yourself sluggishly heating up a bowl of soup, cuddling up on the couch and going to bed at 9 o’clock? You’re not lazy! It’s you body’s way of saying “slow the eff down sister!” (Ok you’re inner wisdom might be a little gentler than that.)
Regardless, you know that feeling that comes on as “meh” and ends with “God, I’m just so drained!” I’ve long resisted these feelings, and even judged myself for them. However, I’ve come to realize it’s not a bad thing to have an inner guidance system that’s trying to tell me the best way to treat myself. Instead of fighting these urges we can learn to flow with the season, and reap all of it’s benefits.
How do we do this?
First let’s notice what’s going on in nature and why. The earth strips herself of excess. She releases what has lived out it’s purpose and reverts back to the basics. She is raw, exposed, and unwelcoming, almost as if to say “leave me alone!” She’s quite literally chilling out. After a yearly cycle of new life in the spring, vibrance in the summer, and abundance in the fall she’s taking a much needed vacation. We also live out our lives in cycles; daily, monthly, yearly, and lifetime. We ebb and flow from outward energy, to inward retreating. It’s the nature of the universe. Without allowing ourselves to flow through these cycles we become unwell and out of balance.
So we look to mother nature and imitate her. Something in us deeply desires to slow down, be still, and reflect upon the past year. We need this in order to flourish when spring comes again.
Designing a self-care routine is essential in maintaining a happy and healthy life. But, self-care that reflects the energy of each season, well now you’re a self-care over achiever! Implementing this winter self-care ritual into your daily or weekly routine will greatly impact the way you move through this season, which can often be difficult to embrace.
Tips for Winter Self Care
Your body needs so much extra love and attention this time of year. Our bodies are more susceptible to illness, fatigue, and stress. Yes, it’s a harsh season, but by doing this self care you can glide through winter effortlessly.
Winter Movement
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that in the cooler months our bodies need to move to build up heat. While it may be the hardest time of year to move your body, it may be the most essential. Because we can get a bit stagnant, our bodies can feel heavy and tired, and heat building movement is the antidote.
On the flip side we can often get run down and stressed (especially during the holidays) which is when a slow, grounding Yin Yoga practice will be essential to your overall wellness.
Seasonal Food
It seems innate that in the colder months we crave warmer foods. I think we all get that; but let’s take it a step further. Winter can be characterized as dry and windy, which may lead us to need more moist and grounding foods like heavy stews and roasted root vegetables. The food we eat this time of year can greatly enhance our ability to adapt to the harsher climate. Not to mention, strengthen our immune system to fight off whatever is going around (and something is always going around!)
While many places this time of year don’t have fresh produce (I really do miss the farmsteads right now) there are still many foods that are aligned with the comfy and warm feelings of the winter. This is the time of year to up your intake of healthy fats, dark leafy greens, and roasted root vegetables.
Reflection
This time of year, as nature does, we too turn inward and prepare for the coming spring by resting and reflecting. When you pay more attention to your inner thoughts and desires, you begin to open up to the abundant possibilities, and are capable of creating the life of your dreams. The key is getting quiet enough that you can hear what that little voice of wisdom is saying to you. As the the New Year brings with it a renewed sense of “clean slate-ness”, we are given the opportunity to up our game, better our habits, manifest our desires, and act on our dreams.
I urge you to make a regular practice during the winter months of journaling. You can write about feelings that come up for you and explore what unknown triggers bring you into a dark place. This is a safe time to explore the darker sides of yourself. If something in your life has made you sad, angry, or disappointed it is safe to explore and experience those feelings now. Winter is naturally a dark time, so do’t feel guilty if you experience your own mental winter at times
Rest & Restore
Do you often feel like you’re beginning to come down with something, but after you chill for a bit or take a nap you feel better. Maybe you weren’t sick after all but just needed a break. Without listening to our bodies when we need to recharge, we set ourselves up for illness, stress, and exhaustion. This time of year our bodies naturally need more time to rest. There’s less sunlight and less energy in the air. Give yourself to take it easier this season.
I hope you are able to take some time for yourself this winter. If you would like to get more tips for winter self-care including seasonal recipes, a winter yin yoga sequence, and an at home retreat for winter be sure to subscribe below and I will send over my free guide to winter self-care.
xo,
by Caroline | Jan 7, 2017 | Self Care
I use essential oils all year round, that’s so secret. However, from season to season we have different needs in mind and body. We eat different foods, have different routines, and treat our bodies differently. So it would make sense that we should use essential oils seasonally too. Here are my favorite winter essential oils to bring about greater health and balance this time of year.
Thieves
Thieves is really one of my must-haves year round, but it’s crucial to my health in the winter time. Thieves essential oil is a powerful blend of clove, lemon, cinnamon, eucalyptus, and rosemary essential oils. It’s rich and spicy aroma is always pleasing this time of year. It’s actually inspired by a legend about a group of spice merchants in 15th century France who formulated a blend of spices they used while robbing the bodies of plague victims. Apparently it kept them from dying of the plague, and therefore this blend was known to boost immunity, and guard against disease.
Though I don’t spend much of my time robbing plague victims, I do spend a lot of time with children who get sick. There’s always something going around, and every day I am bombarded with all sorts of germs. I diffuse thieves in my office, and rub it on my feet at night, and put a drop in some hot water with honey when I feel like I’m coning down with a cold. If there was one essential oil I could not live without, it’s this one.
Digize
I know I say I couldn’t live without thieves, but I really really can’t live without Digize. As the name hints, it’s incredible for digestive issues. I rub a drop on my stomach or take a drop internally when I am experiencing any type of stomach upset. This stuff is the fastest acting oil I have ever used! Every time I use it I feel better within minutes. I especially love using it after a big meal when I’m so full it hurts (but the food was just too delicious I had to have seconds and thirds). Digize helps my digestive system work through the biggest meals and give me quick relief. It’s also great for nausea, indigestion, heart burn, and the dreaded stomach bug.
Joy
Joy is my favorite antidote to the winter blues. Honestly when I first tried this one I didn’t like the floral smell of it. They say if you are put off by an essential oil’s smell you probably need whatever is in it. Well apparently I needed more joy in my life, luckily now I have it. The funny thing is once I began using it regularly I became increasingly fond of the smell, and now I absolutely love it.
Lavender
Lavender, while great all year, is especially calming during the winter months when we can feel stressed and out of sorts. During the holidays this is a great one to diffuse to inspire a calming mood. I put a drop of lavender on my face and neck each night when I am going to bed. It’s great for the skin, and helps my go to sleep. Aside from being ultra relaxing, lavender is like the Swiss army knife of essential oils and can do pretty much anything. Got a cut, bruise, burn? Put lavender on it!
Cedarwood
Another one I didn’t like at first, and now it’s one of my favorites. Cedarwood basically just smells like cedar, which at first I attached to a memory of my gerbal in third grade (lol). After using it every night on my neck to help me sleep I quickly started to think of it as extremely grounding and stable, like a big cedar tree. I love this in the winter time because it brings the outdoors in, during a time when I don’t get out much. It’s known to help relax, and I find it really helps me fall asleep.
by Caroline | Jun 26, 2016 | Self Care
Warning: If you are narrow minded or not accepting of other’s differences you are advised to stop reading now.
There have always been nay-sayers and there have always been truth seekers.
People on the right side of history and people on the wrong side of history.
We live in a world with all types of people. People who are kind, and people who are bullies. For some of us it’s hard to hear so much hatred toward others. It’s extremely hard to avoid this in the modern era, where everybody shares their thoughts with the world in a matter of seconds
Every generation has it’s cause whether it’s a woman’s right to vote, the civil rights movement, or LGBTQ rights. For every hater and nay-sayer, there are truth seekers. Those who are shining light into the world, raising awareness, and furthering the cause.
Think back to the civil rights movement, when black people had to go to different schools, drink from separate water fountains and sit on different parts of the bus. There were the nay-sayers who wanted to keep them second class citizens. There were also the truth seekers, who knew this was bullshit.The truth seekers tirelessly fought against the nay-sayers and today we live in a pretty different world because of their efforts.
I bet if aliens came down from outer space and started a war with earth, we’d all forget our racial, religious, political differences because this time we’d all be on the same team.
Here’s the thing, we ARE on the same team. Team human all the way!
We’ve constructed theoretical boundaries and geographical borders separating us from one another. We forgot our collective humanness. (And then there are those who want to build an actual wall to reinforce our perceived separateness, but I digress….)
So, how do we deal with people like this?
Well…
I was recently engaged in a conversation in the comments section of an article about a transgender teen, with some people who clearly have nothing better to do with their time than talk shit about someone they don’t even know. I felt immense anger because their hatred was aimed at an innocent young man who has the courage to stand up and be himself. Furthermore, these comments attacked my values! Just like that transgender young man, I believe in being yourself, speaking your truth, and accepting others for their differences because it creates a richer world.
I was enraged, especially in the wake of the Orlando shootings. We still have so much work to do. But what it taught me was how to bring a loving and accepting attitude to negative encounters.
I really wanted to rip this guy a new one and get all preachy on him, but I realized that being hateful and preachy was what he was doing.
How could I step into the darkness that I so deeply want to eradicate and still think that I’m right?
So instead I told him that while I respect his right to his opinion, I wholeheartedly disagree, but thank him for engaging in this open dialogue, because it only furthers the public conversation about the issue. He didn’t realize it but his comments on that public forum will contribute to furthering awareness in the long run, because it got people talking. In the end he will have helped the cause he was against.
It was the people who wanted to keep segregation that fired up the leaders of the civil rights movement.Today it’s the people who narrow-mindedly want to deny rights to the LGBTQ community that get others juiced up about voicing their support. History learns from these people.
We learn how NOT to be.
If you’re one of the nay-sayers who wants to hate on your fellow man, keep on nay-saying!! For every public comment against the rights of a marginalized group, more truth seekers will pop up, ready to lead the charge forward. That’s how change happens!
And if you’re one of the truth seekers, instead of hating the haters, we can thank them for contributing to the advancement of the cause (even if it’s in sort of a backwards way).
LESSON LEARNED: Even if you really hate what someone else is saying, ALWAYS spread love, not hate.
xo,
by Caroline | Mar 20, 2016 | Self Care
So you sit down, get situated, scratch your nose. Now what?
Meditation can be a tricky business. On one hand you feel like you should be putting in some effort in order to get something out of it in return, and on the other hand we expect to sit there and let the wisdom of the ages flood into our being and bring us to enlightenment. When in reality it’s not that simple.
Many of us enter into a meditation practice with expectations; “I’m gonna increase my happiness” or “I’m gonna reduce my anxiety” or “I’m gonna quiet my anger and jealousy.” While those are all great intentions, they’re more like happy bi-products from your meditation practice.
Without having a clear understanding of what you’re doing you may end up day dreaming, kicking yourself every time a thought pops into your head, or becoming disappointed when you don’t feel anything happening.
So, the most important thing is that you understand the ultimate goal of meditation.
The ultimate goal of meditation is to immerse yourself in, and fully experience your own consciousness and awareness, or your True Self.
Say what now?
I believe that your True Self, is who you are without the labels of time and space (gender, weight, occupation, race, social status). Ask yourself who you are at your core, without the stuff that can be written down on paper. Your unique you-ness. The part of you that doesn’t change or grow like age, intellect, and height.
That is your awareness.
It’s the same right now as it was when you were 3 years old, and the same as when you’re 90.
It’s the constant backdrop on which the moments of your life are experienced. Like beads on a string. So really, the Self is not some far deep down place we need to journey to, requiring hours of meditation. It’s always there, and all we need to do is recognize it.
As Sally Kempton says in her book Meditation for the Love of It, “The work of meditation is to coax the mind into letting go of the perceptions and ideas that keep it stuck, so it can expand and reveal itself as it really is.”
Here are some handy dandy tips to deepen your meditation practice without feeling confused or discouraged:
Don’t freak out when you have a thought, try to push away thoughts, judge yourself as a failure for having thoughts, or get fixed on the contents of a thought.
Do: Perceive with loving tenderness the energy that comes up for you during meditation. Notice each thought or feeling that comes up, say hi to it, and let it keep on going. When you find yourself getting too caught up in them, come back to noticing your breath, and start again. The practice is really starting again when you drift off, not staying fully centered.
Don’t challenge your “Self” or the universe to show up in a big way. “Ok, I’m meditating now, show me what ya got!”
Do: Bring forth an attitude of love, gentleness, and trust. The Self is love, and it will draw closer to an attitude of love.
Don’t force yourself into meditation with a feeling of strict inflexibility. “UGH, I don’t have time for this but I know I HAVE to meditate.” Nope. Not happening.
Do: Treat your practice as sacred. Create a beautiful space that invites you in. Set it up in a way that makes you yearn for the time you spend in meditation. Many people like to set up an altar, but I find that word can be a bit religious and scare people off. Use another word or phrase if it feels better, like “my happy corner” or “my pretty place” or “the place my anger goes to die…” You get the idea. See it as a gift from yourself, to yourself so you’ll wanna say “Thanks, me!” In time, the good energy you bring to this place will come to evoke feelings of relaxation, happiness, stillness and clarity, every time you go to it.
Don’t feel Isolated or alone. Cuz you’re not.
Do: Trust that there is a greater power beyond you that connects all things. I know, just go there with me. There is a grace, a spirit (Think of the Force if you’ve ever seen Star Wars) that you connect with during meditation, that will support you and guide you. If you prefer to connect to something tangible to this idea go right ahead. Some people like to envoke the energy of a religious figure like Jesus or Buddha, or maybe an ancient master, like Yoda (no, I’m totally serious). You may even want to call forth something more personal like your inner-guide or guardian angels if you so choose.
Don’t try to stifle your emotions that are going on for you in that moment.
Do: Ask for help. If you are feeling restless, anxious, skeptical, bored, worried or anything that is going to take you away from stillness, offer it up to the universe, or your chosen inner guide, and ask for it to be transformed. If you are struggling with a problem, offer it up at the beginning of your practice: “I offer these feelings up so they can be transformed, and I may see this situation differently.”
You may find that when learning to trust your inner experiences you may be guided by your intuition toward a clearer coarse of action in your outer life. When gaining a deeper understanding of the true self, the fears, negative thoughts and suffering (which are merely products of our own misunderstanding of our ego) may be released. Happy happy, joy joy!
Now I want to hear from you!
Share with me in the comments below your main frustration when it comes to meditating and how you work through it?
XO,
by Caroline | Sep 9, 2015 | Self Care
Last Sunday I sat down to watch Dr. Wayne Dyer on Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday. I began to take notes and draft a blog post about his teachings, which have greatly influenced my life, as well as millions of others. His beliefs aren’t focused on religion, but on love, kindness, and conciousness. I thought to myself how much I would love to see him speak in person, meet him and thank him for everything he has given to the world. I’ve always felt immense gratitude and inspiration when watching or reading Wayne’s teachings.
About 15 minutes after I finished watching the episode I saw that he had passed away. Thinking I must have misunderstood it, I re-read it several times, not believing what I was seeing. That can’t be possible, I thought. He has so much left to teach. Just 15 minutes ago I was thinking how youthful his energy was. This didn’t make any sense.
Then, in remembering some of the things he has said about death, I thought about how much faith he had in the transformation that occurs at the end of a life. He didn’t fear death. He didn’t even believe in death. I can only believe that Wayne is enjoying his transformation on the other side, and can now serve us in a far greater, more profound way.
In honor of him, I wanted to share with all of you some of the most meaningful messages from Dr. Wayne Dyer.
1. You are God.
This concept may seem beyond many people’s understanding or belief system. But when explained so simply it may just make perfect sense to you. If God is a word that doesn’t resonate with you then Universe, Source, or Divine Conciousness are all perfect substitutes. If God is the ocean and we are all a cup of that ocean, we may seem separate from it, but it’s still of that source and still contains God within it. We are a whole cup of God. Even when we don’t feel a connection to our divine source, we are always connected. All of us are individualized expressions of the oneness of God. You are God. Divinity can’t be found outside of you, because it’s who you are.
“So, you have to recognize that God isn’t something outside of you—a cosmic bellboy to whom you pray in order to get this or that if you do the right things.”
2. The illusion of death.
He described how we move through life, first as a baby, then a child, then a teenager, adult and so on. While we may never realize it’s happening, we are constantly transforming, yet we always remain ourselves through it all. There’s a constant thread that continues during all of those transformations. Who you are is that which keeps occupying these new bodies. The soul is the part that is infinite, unchanging and never ending. It doesn’t end when your body ends, just as you didn’t end when you went from a child to a teenager. He explained how death is a similar transformation, in that we retain our soul, that which makes us essentially who we are. Death really is just an illision, we move on to the next form but we stay the same, like walking from one room to another.
“Transformation literally means going beyond your form.”
3. Manifestation of wishes.
This is a topic that is hard to grasp for many, myself included. It’s not as easy as wishing for a brand new car, and expecting it to appear. Dr. Dyer said that “You do not attract what you want. You attract what you are. “ You have to call things that do not exist as if they did. Think of the stories you constantly tell yourself: “I’m sick. I’m poor. I’m unlovable. I don’t have enough of XYZ.” You don’t want to put into your imagination what you don’t want in your life. Instead, place into your imagination what you want to experience, as if it is what you already are. “I am health, I am happiness, I am love.” If your doctor tells you you’re sick you’ll likely connect with sickness and disease as somthing you “are.” When you’re aligned with fear based energies (including hate, doubt, judgement, lack, resentment, and worry) instead of love based energies (which include oneness, acceptance, joy, freedom, peace and happiness) you will keep attracting more fear based stuff into your life. More illness, lack, anger, hostility, and shortages. Go through your life as if your wishes are already fulfiled and on their way. You can choose your thoughts, and your thoughts become your reality.
“What we think determines what happens to us, so if we want to change our lives, we need to stretch our minds.”
4. Forgiveness
If you’re interested in living a happy, and peaceful life, it’s imperative to let go of resentments. Resentments survive in your mind because you are unwilling to move beyond something someone else did in the past. You don’t need to forgive someone else to give them peace. But you must forgive someone else to give yourself peace. Holding anger for someone else is like taking the poison yourself. You don’t give someone a gift when you forgive them. You give that gift of forgiveness for yourself becuase you want to live a joyful life.
“You practice forgiveness for two reasons. To let others know that you no longer wish to be in a state of hostility with them, and to free yourself from the self-defeating energy of resentment.”
5. Outlook
What are you seeing in your world? How do you perceive your experiences? How you see your life matters more than what you see in your life. Once you begin to change that inner projector screen, your experience of your experiences change. The outside world doesn’t necessarily have to change, but your experience of the outside world changes. And sometimes the external situation does change too because it’s just a reflection of your inner condition. Are you willing to start to tell a new story, to see situations differently? You are the creator of your life and your perceptions of that life.
“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
These lessons only scratch the surface. I encourage you to pick up one of his books. It might just change your life.
xo,
by Caroline | Jul 27, 2015 | Self Care
I’ve been thinking a lot about the idea of self-care, and treating ourselves more like how we treat our friends and loved ones.
It all started with a video going around the internet, where women wrote scripts of the negative things they say to themselves, then watched as others acted it out in a real life setting. It was very powerful, watching a woman tell her friend that she looked way too fat in those pants and she has to go to the gym more or else nobody would love her.
The things we say to ourselves would never fly if they were said out loud to others, let alone someone we love.
I like to think of it this way: a mother is entrusted with the life of her child, and because she loves that child so much she’ll do anything and everything in her power to make sure that child is given the best of everything. Healthy food, a loving home, encouraging words, self confidence, time to be creative and play. She takes care of that child’s body when they are sick and always reasure them that everything will be all right.
Similarly, at the beginning of our lives we’re entrusted with our own body, heart, and mind to look after. Yet we don’t always take care of ourselves. We may not always think twice about consuming alcohol, sugar and processed foods and we’ll occasionally have negative self talk in our heads. If you were taking care of your child or friend or parent you wouldn’t neglect these aspects of their lives, so why do we do it to ourselves?
The energy we perpetuate by neglecting our own self care routines is inhibiting our ability to blossom into the amazing individuals that we’re all intended to be.
Experiment with this: Try to notice when you are saying negative things to yourself, and when you do ask yourself if you would say this to your best friend. If not, try to change your words around to be more loving and encouraging.
When you want that fifth girl scout cookie (because come on, who can have less than that?) instead of saying “you shouldn’t eat that because you will feel fat and guilt ridden” maybe try to say “love, you are so precious and perfect, you don’t need such poison to make you feel happy or satisfied. I love you too much to see you sabotage your health in this mindless way. Maybe enjoy one if it feels right for you, and know it’s ok to stop after that.”
A great way to bring more self-care into your life is through daily routines.
They don’t have to take any time out of your day, but they can be woven into other activities, or made a priority over watching the latest episode of The Real Housewives. As long as you make it a priority to address the needs of your mind, body and spirit you will be loving how good you are to yourself.
Mind
- Pratctice one minute a day of gratitute. Think of all the things that you’re grateful for right now. Even include the small things. Write them down if you have the time. Even better, start a gratitude journal.
- Practice one minute a day of self love. Think of 5 things you love about yourself. If you can’t think of any, try to think of what your mom or best friend would say about you. Write them down. Or ask your best friend or significant other to send you a list of things they love about you and go from there.
- Journaling. When you sit down and write whatever is on your mind and just keep the pen moving and you get some real insight into the inner workings of your brain and emotions. Not only does getting your thoughts onto paper help clear out all the noise in your head, you may start to see certain situations from a new perspective, and you can learn about what thoughts are occupying too much room in your head.
Body
- Get outside and move. If you live in a place that allows for it go for a walk or bike ride every day, or at least get outside when you can. The healing benefits of being in nature are real!
- Essential Oils. It is important to know that if you’re going to use essential oils on your body it’s always best to use theraputic grade (not the kind you find in the health food store which should be used aromatically only). I use theraputic grade essential oils not only for my physical health but for my mental wellbeing too, and they work!
- Exercise. Not only does it release endorphines and increase your energy and physical health, it provides mental clarity and an increase in personal confidence and self worth. Yoga is my absolute favorite, go-to feel better immediately routine. It cures everything from sadness, anger, frustration, low energy, pain, and just a general feeling of blaaah.
Spirit
- Guided meditations for relaxation, clarity, enhanced confidence/motivation and increased spiritual connection are great and you can find many free meditations on Youtube.
- Find or create a mantra. Look around the internet to find one that resonates with you, or sit quietly in meditation and see what comes up. Some to get you started are: This too shall pass. Breathe in love, breathe out fear. I feel calm and serene. I love myself. I am having a great day.
- Read. I feed my spirit everyday by reading uplifting, thought provoking books on spirituality. Find a book or an author that speaks to your soul and read that before going to bed or first thing in the morning. My favorite authors are Gabby Bernstein, Depak Chopra, Marianne Williamson, and Caroline Myss.
xo,
