I’ve been thinking a lot about the idea of self-care, and treating ourselves more like how we treat our friends and loved ones.
It all started with a video going around the internet, where women wrote scripts of the negative things they say to themselves, then watched as others acted it out in a real life setting. It was very powerful, watching a woman tell her friend that she looked way too fat in those pants and she has to go to the gym more or else nobody would love her.
The things we say to ourselves would never fly if they were said out loud to others, let alone someone we love.
I like to think of it this way: a mother is entrusted with the life of her child, and because she loves that child so much she’ll do anything and everything in her power to make sure that child is given the best of everything. Healthy food, a loving home, encouraging words, self confidence, time to be creative and play. She takes care of that child’s body when they are sick and always reasure them that everything will be all right.
Similarly, at the beginning of our lives we’re entrusted with our own body, heart, and mind to look after. Yet we don’t always take care of ourselves. We may not always think twice about consuming alcohol, sugar and processed foods and we’ll occasionally have negative self talk in our heads. If you were taking care of your child or friend or parent you wouldn’t neglect these aspects of their lives, so why do we do it to ourselves?
The energy we perpetuate by neglecting our own self care routines is inhibiting our ability to blossom into the amazing individuals that we’re all intended to be.
Experiment with this: Try to notice when you are saying negative things to yourself, and when you do ask yourself if you would say this to your best friend. If not, try to change your words around to be more loving and encouraging.
When you want that fifth girl scout cookie (because come on, who can have less than that?) instead of saying “you shouldn’t eat that because you will feel fat and guilt ridden” maybe try to say “love, you are so precious and perfect, you don’t need such poison to make you feel happy or satisfied. I love you too much to see you sabotage your health in this mindless way. Maybe enjoy one if it feels right for you, and know it’s ok to stop after that.”
A great way to bring more self-care into your life is through daily routines.
They don’t have to take any time out of your day, but they can be woven into other activities, or made a priority over watching the latest episode of The Real Housewives. As long as you make it a priority to address the needs of your mind, body and spirit you will be loving how good you are to yourself.
Mind
- Pratctice one minute a day of gratitute. Think of all the things that you’re grateful for right now. Even include the small things. Write them down if you have the time. Even better, start a gratitude journal.
- Practice one minute a day of self love. Think of 5 things you love about yourself. If you can’t think of any, try to think of what your mom or best friend would say about you. Write them down. Or ask your best friend or significant other to send you a list of things they love about you and go from there.
- Journaling. When you sit down and write whatever is on your mind and just keep the pen moving and you get some real insight into the inner workings of your brain and emotions. Not only does getting your thoughts onto paper help clear out all the noise in your head, you may start to see certain situations from a new perspective, and you can learn about what thoughts are occupying too much room in your head.
Body
- Get outside and move. If you live in a place that allows for it go for a walk or bike ride every day, or at least get outside when you can. The healing benefits of being in nature are real!
- Essential Oils. It is important to know that if you’re going to use essential oils on your body it’s always best to use theraputic grade (not the kind you find in the health food store which should be used aromatically only). I use theraputic grade essential oils not only for my physical health but for my mental wellbeing too, and they work!
- Exercise. Not only does it release endorphines and increase your energy and physical health, it provides mental clarity and an increase in personal confidence and self worth. Yoga is my absolute favorite, go-to feel better immediately routine. It cures everything from sadness, anger, frustration, low energy, pain, and just a general feeling of blaaah.
Spirit
- Guided meditations for relaxation, clarity, enhanced confidence/motivation and increased spiritual connection are great and you can find many free meditations on Youtube.
- Find or create a mantra. Look around the internet to find one that resonates with you, or sit quietly in meditation and see what comes up. Some to get you started are: This too shall pass. Breathe in love, breathe out fear. I feel calm and serene. I love myself. I am having a great day.
- Read. I feed my spirit everyday by reading uplifting, thought provoking books on spirituality. Find a book or an author that speaks to your soul and read that before going to bed or first thing in the morning. My favorite authors are Gabby Bernstein, Depak Chopra, Marianne Williamson, and Caroline Myss.
xo,
